Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Dancin Around With a Bunch of Kansas City Faggots

They are hard. They are fast. They are loud. They drink. They swear. They throw dildos at audience members. You’re mom doesn’t like them. They have the best band name ever. They are The Kansas City Faggots.

Homegrown here in Dallas, The Kansas City Faggots have been local icons over the years in the garage punk scene, making mince meat out of clubs like the Double-Wide, Red Blood Club, and the Darkside Lounge. Their fast-paced, powerful presence causes dancing, laughter, thrashing, screaming, and fights. No one forgets a Kansas City Faggots show. They literally swallow the stage. In fact, the first time I saw them, front-man Jason (aka Wizard) tossed a dildo at my best friend’s head. Of course, I’ve seen them about eight times since that night.

Over two mammoth cases of Lone Star, band members Pete (drums), Monty (lead guitar), Wizard (vocals), Adrian (rhythm guitar), and Mark (bass), sat down with us a few months back for a night of drunken sarcasm and merriment.

GP: Where did the name Kansas City Faggots come from?

Wizard: It came from Blazing Saddles. There’s a line in the beginning of the movie where the, um, African American young man happened to be working, digging, and Slim Pickins comes up, and, I guess, his buddies are supposed to be laying some railroad, but they’re not, they’re dancing around “like a bunch of Kansas City Faggots”. That’s where the name comes from. It’s just a line or quote from the movie. Our friend thought it would be suitable for us, so we had to throw it out there and take it.

GP: When did you get into playing music?

Pete: I started with Adrian about ten years ago in the Backstabbers.

Monty: I’ve been playing around with a bunch of friends for a while. Met up with Adrian through a friend, and I been jamin with him for the past six or seven years.

Wizard: I started in a band called M.S.G.sus. I been playing music ever since I ran into Adrian and Monty. Started a band called Roctopus. I was terminated from that band, and I seem to have resurfaced like herpes.

Adrian: I started late. I didn’t get into any bands until I was 24 or 25 years old. We started playing in Bad Machine and stuff like that. It’s been about 8 or 9 years that I’ve been playing in the local scene with these guys.

Mark: Started out about 10 or 12 years ago. I was in a band called the Fuck Lords. Same guys just different combinations.

GP: Why is Wizard called Wizard?

Wizard: My last name is Whisenant . It’s a Swedish and Danish name. It’s like Smith in Sweden: a pretty common name. I also seem to have a magical talent of disappearing , but I show up at the last minute. I reckon it came from my last name, I’ve been called that since I was five. Pete called my grandpa Gramp Wizard.

GP Are there any other genres of music you’d like to play outside of the garage punk style you play right now?

Pete: No.

Monty: No, unless it’s some fag stuff.

Wizard: I’m just going to have to say with the exception of… no.

Adrian: Country.

Mark: I listen to country, but I don’t necessarily want to play it.

GP: Any stories behind any of the song lyrics?

Wizard: We have a song called “Dope“. Pretty self explanatory: it’s about drugs. It’s about how they fuck you up and wreck everything you ever really cared about. It hits kinof close to the bone ‘cause I had a drug problem for a long time, I was actually “disbanded” from this band for a while due to my drug problem, but I came back, of course. Other than that, all the songs have meaning and importance, but, eh… not so much.

GP: How much collaboration goes into the writing of songs?

Pete: Adrian writes a lot of the songs, Monty writes the guitar, Wizard does all the lyrics. Sometimes it’s a mix of all of us.

Monty: We just get together and jam.

Wizard: Music comes first, then the lyrics. I try and throw [lyrics] down on top of t

he music that they write. Monty has done some lyrics before. He wrote most of “One Down Five Up”, that’s a great song. You ought to listen if you ever get the chance. When the Cd gets out, after your third or fourth child is

born. Adrian writes the rhythm, and Mark comes up with a groovy bass line, Monty comes up with some leads…

Pete: Pete comes up with some drums..

Wizard: Nah, Pete just shows up.

Pete: Screw you…

GP: Who is the band that you, as a member of the Kansas City Faggots, had the most fun playing with, who was the shittiest, and who would you like to play with that you haven’t had a chance to yet?

Pete: I got to think about this. I had a great time playing with Electric Frankenstein, but the shittiest… there’s so

many out there: tons. I’d like to play with Turbonegro and Deco Jones.

Monty: Most fun: Electric Frankenstein. I wasted as shit that night… shouldn’t have been driving.

Adrian: The band I had the most fun playing with was Ironhead, and the band that I had the least fun playing with was Glister.

Mark: I got to play with the Chumps and the Reclusives in Austin and that was pretty cool, but recently Electric Frankenstein was the coolest show I’ve played with in a while.

Wizard: Electric Frankenstein was great. They’re awesome musicians, fun to hang out with. If I had to choose anyone to p

lay with it’d probably be Jeff Dahl. I’d like to play with New Bomb Turks, Eric Davidson, probably my biggest influence vocally and lyrically, I’d really dig to play with those guys, but I haven’t gotten the chance, and they broke up, so I guess we’re all kind of screwed on playing with bands we want to play with. The worst had to be this band from Houston called the Jonks. These sons of bitches were whining ‘cause they wanted to headline, and it was us and

American Ruse, and they wanted to headline because they were from Houston, and I think that they had maybe in total one and a half people there, and the half because this dude’s girlfriend was really short. She was ugly as homemade baloney too. They were fucking horrible.

GP: What are some of your favorite local bands?

Pete: Last of the Interceptors, the Boozers and the Valentine Failures.

Monty: Everything Pete said.

Wizard: I’m gonna have to say the Valentine Failures. The Kansas City Faggots.

Adrian: The Backsliders. Nice band, like them a lot.

GP: What side projects have you done?

Wizard: We had a band called The Originals for a while. It was all covers.

GP: What’s the most memorable, insane thing that’s happened at a concert?

Wizard: I’ve been hit in the face with a full beer can that broke my nose. So far, since I’ve been in just this band, I got a broken nose, I got two broken vertebrae, a torn rotator cuff, two broken fingers, and a really bad disposition. The craziest shit that’s ever happened, probably after the show, passed out in a bathtub while my bass player’s running water trying to drown me. Throwing up off a balcony in a hotel room with Beachballs from American Ruse onto a car: that was pretty dangerous, wait no, me and Beachballs jumping off of a van into the wall seeing who could put bigger holes into the hotel wall. That was pretty funny.

Mark: Super 8 was really good sports about all that.

Pete: You can get away with everything there: holes in walls, puke, murder…

GP: Do you have any big phobias?

Pete: I’m afraid of heights.

Monty: I’m afraid of butterflies.

Wizard: I’m not a big fan of monkeys. I don’t like them organ-bangin fucks. I don’t like them symbol-bangin fucks. None of them. I don’t like monkeys period. Kill all of them dead.

Adrian: Uh…

Wizard: He doesn’t like broken strings.

Pete: That’s not a phobia.

Wizard: Are you kidding? Have you seen him break a string on stage?!?”

Adrian: Dirty socks. I got a problem with dirty socks. I can’t stand to have dirty socks.

Mark: Chinese food. You never know what’s in that shit.

Since this interview bass player Mark has left the band and been replaced with one hell of a cute blonde bassist: Traci. Also, we’ve never bothered to contact Super 8 Motel for a comment on the lewd behavior that ensued during the Faggots’ stay; however, if such behavior is actually tolerated, The Gristle and the Pulp would be highly interested in planning several dodge-ball, television-bashing parties in the next few months.

-written by Alison Marie Welsh
-interview conducted by Alison Marie Welsh and Janelle Tohill
-pictures by Alison Marie Welsh

For more about the Kansas City Faggots, visit

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